Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

Can this be true?

http://www.couriermail.com.au/lifestyle/the-average-woman-changes-hairstyle-104-times-in-a-lifetime/story-e6frer4f-1225891758606

According to today’s Courier Mail, the average woman changes her hairstyle 104 times in her lifetime. Unless you’re Princess Anne – or me. I’ve had long, straight, naturally light brown hair without a fringe for the last 20 years or so. The only thing that varies – slightly – is the length, when I get around to having my split ends cut off.

So, am I a freak? Are the rest of you all off to the hairdresser’s once a fortnight to modify your manes? Sure, I sported some…. let’s call them interesting… dos in the 80s. The spiral perm, and that odd mod cut with spikes on one side and a fringe so long I had to walk around with my head tilted at 45 degrees so I could see around it.

True confessions time: What’s the worst hair you’ve ever had, and how often do you change your look, hair-wise? Your secrets are completely safe with me – cross my hair and hope to dye.

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117 Responses

  1. I bleached my hair blonde when I was 17. It was a delicious honey blonde, and looked amazing. So I figured a shade lighter would look even better. Wrong! Lime green was not my colour. Trying to rectify the damage, I thought a perm would help. Wrong again! I spent the next six months looking like I was wearing one of those frizzy green clown wigs. Ugh!

    “Never again!” I vowed, and let the mess grow out on its own. It took a looooong time. I especially hated when Japanese tourists took photos of me and giggled.

    It did grow out. And I let it grow. So for over 20 years, I have had very long, straight hair. I’d trim the fringe in my preening mirror every few months, until five years ago, when I grew the fringe out.

    It wasn’t just the exorbitant cost of hairstyling, or the fear of looking like my mother had had a fling with Bozo, it was mainly that I just couldn’t be bothered. Long, straight hair requires zero maintenance. Wash, comb, scrunchie, done. Vanity comes into it, too. I loved my long, silky hair.

    Until last week.

    Mayhem started chemo, and I wanted to do something meaningful. So I cut all my hair off. It looks bleargh – which means avoiding tourists with cameras. It’s a good thing I’ve had practice at that.

    But as my old dad always used to say, “never mind, it’ll grow back”. As long as Mayhem and I can spend the next 20 years growing our hair back together, I’m happy with that.

  2. The worst haircuts I’ve ever had in my life were those done with my mother, using the kitchen scissors and a pudding basin as props.

    Which could explain my addiction to the hairdresser.
    I turn up faithfully, every two months, hoping to see something other than a reform school inmate staring back at me.

    Mostly it works.
    And its cheaper than therapy.

    Now, I’m off into the 5 degree wind chill to walk the dog.
    I am perfectly coiffed but 2 minutes in that wind will turn me straight back into a Golly Wog.

  3. Good on you, Catty. What a brave and supportive thing to do. I’m sure you look better than you think, too.

    I hope you’re taking care of your hands in the icy winds, Quokka. You’ll need them for acing your exam tomorrow.

    šŸ™‚

  4. My worst haircuts were after, as a four year old, using the clippers to cut into the cardboard box the clippers came in, breaking off one of the tongy bits. From then on, haircuts were excruciatingly painful, but Dad, the sadist, kept using them year after year until I left school and ahd money to pay for the barber.
    If not for those clippers, I would have continued on to uni!

    Now, I’d settle for any bad hair day becaue that suggests a prerequisite, ie, having hair!
    Hair today, gone tomorrow indeed! Haha!

  5. I’ve got plenty of hair, Stafford. Would you like to borrow some of mine?

  6. I tore some of mine out at the roots this am when I discovered that my brain recalled nothing whatsoever about the properties of bisphosphonates.

    Lead me to the pancakes.
    I am undone.

  7. Biphosphon-whats?

    Not long ’till pancakes now, Quokka. I hope you can keep it together until then. No word yet from Greybeard, so I’ve invaded his blog again.

  8. You and me both. Its just that you beat me to it by about 10 seconds. Great minds, clearly.

    I’m off to take dog for his walk to UQ.
    There’s a lolly shop there.
    Its a source of great inspiration to me.

    My, how things have changed since I was a 19yro at Uni.

    When I was a James Cook Uni there was a rec club with a concrete floor (they hosed it down by way of cleaning it) and you could buy beer, hamburgers and chips.

    Sushi? Slushies? Kebabs?
    Peh.

    Kids these days are spoilt. spoilt, I tell you.
    Oh, and remind me to have a good long bitch on Pancake Day about the soccer moms who think that their 4WD lexus has parking rights over council buses at the UQ lakes bus stop by the green (bus) bridge.

  9. Fabulous – he should find it hard to resist a two-headed invitation.

    Mmm… sushi.

    Okay, Quokka’s pancake rant list:
    * Lexus 4WD parking – check.

    Anything else to add at this point?

  10. Clip on ties.
    The dog found and ingratiated himself to a gaggle of girls in our school uniform at the UQ lakes bus stop.

    I commented on the torture of those hats and said ‘looks like not much has changed since I escaped from that in 1982.’

    The girls corrected me and showed me the new improved clip on ties. ‘Betcha didn’t have these.’

    I told them no, we had the kind you could yank into an effective strangle hold and thus haul your unwilling victim wherever the whim took you.

    Which could explain the new version.
    And which may explain the unnatural length of my neck.

  11. Explain to me again why I wasn’t considered prefect material?

  12. Will you people pleeeeeease stop talking about pancakes? Every time you do, I miss out on something.

    The Boss discovered that Bill Bailey is doing a show at the Palais tomorrow night. He checked to make sure we had enough money for tickets. We didn’t. Not that it mattered, because when he asked his mum to babysit, she said she’s already babysitting her other grandkids tomorrow.

    So Saturday night will be spent watching Inspector Frost repeats. Again. *sigh*

    Bloody pancakes.

  13. Erm, I do change my hairstyle occasionally. In summer I use a #4 comb on my beard and in winter a #6. Given my 40 years of beardedness (if you count Fu Manchu’s, Goatee’s Mexican Bandit’s etc) that makes at least 80 changes of hairstyle. So there! And we’d lerve the pancakes. Oh, and CC? PANCAKES!!

  14. With frozen whipped butter and macadamia nuts and maple syrup, to add insult to injury.

    Catty – Black Books Fan?
    If so I hope you’ve watched the IT crowd.
    If not go get it from the video store, it’ll do you nicely instead of Bill.

    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a bag of sweets and I’m heading for the couch to curl up back in foetal and continue where I left off with the Sarah Connor Chronicles.

    I probably have more hair stories in me, including what I do to cats, but as you know, zombies sucked my brains out this morning between 10am and 12.30.

  15. Oh yeah.
    Pancake eaters, what time?
    9am Sunday 25th or is that too early for you?
    We will need to book.

    And GB, WTF is wrong with gmail these last few days?
    There’s some serious goblins in mine. And I’m scared to ask at CBG because I think that’s an orange card for Faff or general computer ignorance or some other crime.

  16. Mm, haven’t noticed a problem with gmail. I use it all day chatting with the kids and it seems to have been reliable? And 9am Sunday 25th would be fine. Just, where is it again?

  17. Borrowed hair? Mate, there is nothing worse than the look of a bloke with a bad rug! Anyway, I’m a nartural blonde, have been for twenty years! I imagine you as Morticia, long, straight, raven black.
    Does Kerry Obrien wear a wig?

  18. Gmail still won’t let me compose or reply to email.
    Bizarre.

    Moving on to house keeping, does this suit everyone?

    Sunday 25 July
    9am
    Pancake Manor Charlotte Street

    I had a dream last night that JB organized our burger lunch for that day too. Should we warn him or is our venue just a bit too embarrassing to admit to?

  19. Stafford, I wanted to BE Morticia when I was younger. Sadly, though, my locks are an almost-blonde shade of light brown. And I know very little french.

    Quokka, P date looks great. If it suits Mayhem, would you care to book for us? We don’t want to miss out on… you know… I don’t want to type the word to save Catty’s feelings. And there’s NOTHING embarrassing about our venue!

    Greybeard, glad you can join us.

    I’m sorry to hear about the clip-on ties. In my five less than illustrious years at that school, I never learnt how to tie my own tie. I’d just keep it knotted as long as possible, then asked my Dad to do it when needed. Sadly, I wasn’t prefect material either.

    Re Gmail: I haven’t had any problems with it – have you run a security programme to make sure you’re not suffering from some sort of gremlin?

  20. I did the tie thing for all of my kids but even worse, for one of the teachers. Every time we had some special event, visiting indignitary or whatever, he would do the MC act and I’d provide a nice double Windsor. When I left, he brought in every tie he owned and had me knot them loosely for later use. Funny guy. But then we had archery practice in the IT room and skulls on the walls so . . .

  21. Were the skulls on the walls the spoils of the archery practice, Greybeard?

  22. Spoils from detention, I would think.

    And yes, I will make the booking in a few days when the rest have checked in and confirmed numbers. Table for Quokka.

    Is there anyone else we should invite?

  23. Funnily enough, I can only think of several that we SHOULDN’T…

  24. TOO LATE! (And none of the skulls were human. Which doesn’t rule out 9G.)

  25. Shhh, keep it down, will you? I’m trying to watch Inspector Frost.

  26. As you were. The Boss just channel surfed to Midsomer Murders. And James Bond. He’s watching all three now, and it’s making my head ache.

    So I thought I’d go in for a little self-help therapy instead of trying to follow three programs at once. I had recently seen a Medical TV show, on which a doctor proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. “Sounds plausible”, I thought. “Why not give it a try?”

    I looked around my house for things I’d started and hadn’t finished. There were quite a few unfinished things, so I set about finishing them off. I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of vocda, a pockage of Prunglies , tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valum priscriptins, the res of the Chesescke and a bax a shocolets.

    Yu haf no idr who fkin gud I fel.

  27. Catty… Catty?

    Will someone please nip down to Melbourne, roll Catty onto her side into the coma position and make sure her airway is clear?

    Oh – and if there’s any cheesecake or Valium left over, please send it my way.

  28. Dear Ms Cat (could someone show this to her when she’s returned to her normal state of feline alertness?) you need some technomalogical rather than pharmacological goodies. Now I use a nice, free little program called iViewNapper for those times when I’ve missed something on ABC. There’s also SBSNapper and P7Napper for channel 7. Not all programs are available – no movies for example – but it’s quite handy if you don’t want to watch them live, AND you don’t want to mess with all that P2P piratey stuff. Naturally I would not (unlike NowhereBob) suggest that all episodes are available at sites such as TPB and Demonoid. Not sure what channel Frost is on. I’ve watched it to the very end. I suppose he was entitled to retire but I’ll miss it.

  29. iViewNapper… what does it do, Greybeard? Fill in the gaps when you’ve dozed off in the middle of the programme?

    That would be handy for Midsomer Murders. Love the show, never manage to stay awake to see who dunnit.

  30. It takes you to the server where the ABC stores its iView programs, gives you a nice clear categorised list of everything available, and when you see one you want, you click “fetch”. It then downloads the episode to your PC. You can watch it there or burn to a disk or stream to your TV if you have it networked. It’s all good! Advanced students record from the BBC in the UK and Hulu in the US but that requires the black arts and, er, certain sacrifices.

  31. Has anyone mentioned pancakes to girlclumsy?
    I’m trying to think if there’s anyone else we’ve missed but my brain is still numb after that bloody exam and my mind is just going blank.

    I was going to say something else but farked if I can remember what it was.

    la la la.

  32. I have a conundrum. Are you supposed to cook the bacon rashers before the meatloaf goes in the oven, or do you drape them on raw?

    The Boss made his first meatloaf yesterday, and we’ve been ‘debating’ about it ever since.

    ????????

  33. I drape them on raw, Catty. They crisp up nicely as the meatloaf cooks. I think, if you cooked them first, they might burn.

    Yes, invite girlclumsy by all means, Quokka. She’s a big maple syrup fan. And don’t worry about the brain deficit thing… we’ve all got it.

  34. Fifi wraps the bacon around the mix raw (fairly sure) and chopped green chilies and lots of pecan nuts. Dang, now I’m hungry.

  35. Mmm… pecans.

  36. I cook meatloaf in bar tins (as per cake bars) and I drape about three long rashes of bacon over the base so that they hang over the sides, stuff the filling in and then secure the tops of the bacon with toothpicks.

    That way the flavor of the bacon goes all through the mix and the bacon fat steams up through the loaf, and the top bacony bit goes all crispy.

  37. Catty three. Boss, nil.

    Yay! I win!

    Thank you.

    Now you’re all examinated, Quokka, will you be starting your own blog? Or at least, visiting mine?

  38. Quokka, that sounds divine – I’ll have to give it a go. I’ve only ever draped it over the top.

    Glad we could be of help, Catty.

  39. I promise I’ll get over to your blog, Catty, but don’t think I’ll have time for one of my own till I’m done with the study. I start back at school in two weeks, two subjects next semester.

    BTW Qld IGA sux.
    I stopped in at one earlier – no Bertie Beetles, no lolly gobble bliss bombs.

    Count your blessings that you live in the seat of culture, Ms Catty. I am feeling very deprived.

  40. Ladies, count me in for Sunday breakfast. Sorry too bloody tired to do updates at the moment.

    Do you want me to put out a shout on twitter?

  41. Mayhem, that would be great. Thanks.
    I figure so long as I make the booking by Friday we should be sweet.

  42. Look forward to seeing you there, Mayhem.

    I’m not surprised to hear about the Bertie Beetles, Quokka – I heard the only-at-the-Ekka rumour ages ago. Lolly Gobble Bliss Bombs are freely available at our Woolies, though, so give that a go – or would you like me to bring down a packet for you on Sunday?

  43. Woollies?
    I’ll duck down to Buranda and see what they’ve got.
    I’m pretty sure that’s the only place I can get Homer Hudson ice cream and we’re all out.

    If they don’t come up with the goods then I may just take you up on that, MM.

    BTW, are you interested in this writers festival that Hughesy is organizing?

    One of my girlfriends up near Noosa is keen so I’m gonna give it some thought. Aside from which Nbob might go and I’m keen to discover if he really does look like a serial killer.

  44. I’m sure Nbob doesn’t look like a serial killer – he probably looks like the Staypuft marshmallow man.

    It’s called “Reality Bites” and the programme does look interesting. Indeed, JB is making a few appearances on apanel or two. My problem with attending is that it’s on the weekend, and I probably won’t be able to find anyone to wrangle the offspring… unless it was late on a Sunday arvo.

    Let me know if you need a care package of LGBB. Hmm, that acronymn is wrongish, isn’t it? Comes across like gay popcorn…

  45. Um, just going back to Mayhem’s use of the term “Ladies”. (Amusing in this context?) Will there be any other males at the pancake do? Only I’m feeling shy or nervous or outnumbered or something.

  46. I could loan you a nice frock, Greybeard. You’ll feel right at home.

  47. That’s it, I’m bailing. I’m not wearing a frock. Again.

  48. Oh, come on, Greybeard. You were the only bloke last time, and we didn’t pour syrup on you or anything… not even a trickle!

  49. GB, you sook. Nbob’s taunts are clearly getting to you.
    If it counts at all, my bloke will be there.
    He’s painting his toe nails in honor of the occasion.

  50. “If it counts at all”? Well that’s nice. Of course he counts! And NBob’s cruel jibes have wounded me to the quick many times. You underestimate my sensitivity. (Sob)

  51. There, there, have a kleenex.
    Just come along on sunday and you can tell us all about it.
    And then you can tell me why Gmail still doesn’t work and why Gmail tech support don’t seem to care.

    It’ll be fun.

  52. I’ve managed tech support for a large network and I can tell you that in all honesty, we don’t care. We gather around our campfires – fueled with your missing user manuals and critical documents – drink screen-cleaning fluid and curse the devil-spawned users. And we read your emails to one another and laugh.

    (Have you tried using Gmail from a different browser, eg Chrome?)

  53. Greybeard, you worked for the Public Service? It sounds just like my years at the ATO. Ah, happy times.

    Incidentally, if you think wearing a frock in any way diminishes your masculinity, then you must have missed Havsy in his polkadot bikini at JB’s place last Christmas. I assure you, the sight of him in that two-piece perched up the flagpole in no way detracted from his virile manliness. Or so the bunnies said.

    They giggle a lot, those bunnies.

  54. Greybeard, my humble apologies.

  55. Thanks for the tip, GB, I will attempt this later today when I am awake and fully functioning. I’ve suffered some cat induced insomnia the last few nights. Every now and then the felines in our house remember that they are nocturnal and they run up and down the halls bleating and looking for things to kill. Trouble is, all they can find is us. Well, us and the dog, but the dog has the good sense to hide.

  56. And GB, I’m assuming that’s you and your good lady wife for pancakes on Sunday?

    I’ll go chase Nat re: numbers for the booking. I do have this awful feeling that there’s someone we’re neglecting but perhaps that’s just Catty’s Guilt kicking in.

    Just so you know it’s working, Catty dear.

  57. Quokka, why don’t you release some vermin just before retiring so the cats have got some prey to torment? Only if agonised squealing and crunching of tiny bones iseasier to sleep through than hall romping, of course. You may have to experiment.

    And thanks for the pancake organisation. Do you really think we’ve forgotten someone? No-one springs to mind… then again, my mind’s not as bouncy as it once was.

  58. Well yes thanks Q, there’ll be two of us but “good lady” wife? Pause for derisive laughter! And I think Madam M’s idea is brilliant.

  59. I think its study damage.
    I walk around convinced that I’ve forgotten something.
    And, as it turned out, last Friday I discovered I’d forgotten a great deal.

  60. I left a pancake invite at Girl Clumsy’s blog but it hasn’t come up. That happens from time to time, so Mayhem, if you’re out there I’m counting on you to let her know.

    I think I was forgetting Hughesy but she’s probably out of range and from the sounds of things, having done a good job of giving up the fags, does not need the temptation of our carbohydrate loading activities. We can do wheat grass shots with her at the RB festival by way of support.

  61. Wheat grass… *shudder*. How about supportive tequila shots, instead?

  62. I tried some vodka with wheat grass once. Bison brand? Tasted like something a bison might produce too. Now honey & pepper vodka – that’s different.

  63. Vodka and wheatgrass. Hehehe. What’s that called – a Lawnmower?

  64. Sounds hideous.
    Speaking of hideous, the other night while we were watching Glee the crazy wife ate two helpings of grasshopper pie.

    I had never heard of such a thing but I’m betting that Catty is up for the experimental task of making it.
    The recipes I’ve found online say that the base is made from crushed oreo cookies and the filling has wholesome goodness of cream, melted butter, marshmallows and creme de menthe. They use green food colouring to recreate that special shade of lawn fed locust, but I’m guessing that whatever they have in the art supplies closet at your children’s schools should substitute nicely.

    Hm. I had some reason to be here but its slipped my mind. Oh well. It’ll come to me.

  65. It never ceases to amaze me what atrocities Americans insist on calling food. Still, to be on the safe side, we’d better add grasshopper pie to our research list when we go on our fat… I mean FACT finding tour of the USA. (Just waiting on the Government grant, and we’re off!)

    I have actually heard of grasshopper pie before. My mother made one. She was big on authenticity….

    Her rock cakes had rocks in them.

    Her date loaf was made of shredded calendars.

    Her dog biscuits were Lassie flavoured.

    So you can imagine why we weren’t impressed by her grasshopper pie.

    The Boss is a much better creator of fine flavours. His homebrew lemon vodka is particularly nice. While you are feasting on pancakes, I will be sulking in the corner with a half-litre bottle of the stuff. And given the current ‘missing out’ precedent, I’m guessing my weekend plans will dissolve faster than the bathtub enamel when the Boss is making homebrew in there. Thank goodness for Inspector Frost, or my weekend would be a complete loss.

  66. General Brissie Burger Invite tweeted. GC is in Canberra at the moment, I’ll see if I can get through to her with a Direct Message.

  67. Thanks Mayhem.
    The headcount thus far is:
    Quokka x2
    GB x2
    MM x 1
    MH x 1

    I make that six. Which leaves our Melbourne contingent sulking in a corner with the vodka and learning tricks from serial killers, yes?

    If I book for 8 it should leave us room for a couple of extras.

    So.
    9am
    Sunday 25th July
    Pancake Manor
    Charlotte Street
    Booking for 8 x ‘Quokka’.

    BTW, apparently the program for the Brisbane Writers Festival is out in the Australian this weekend. So we can sit there and go through it and figure out if there’s someone we’d like to go watch/heckle, as a group.

    Which also reminds me, a friend was saying that she’d heard something on the radio about an Australian writer who got pissed and obnoxious at one of the writers festivals and the victim of his obnoxiousness got some sort of out of court settlement for the rage/in your face drunken obnoxiousness that he was subjected to.

    Trouble being that she couldn’t remember who it was.
    Any ideas, gang?
    They always dig up these scandals just before the writers festival circuit. I think it boosts interest/ticket sales.

  68. I don’t think I could come at Grasshopper Pie, Catty. How about you eat some and I’ll take notes?

    An Australian writer, pissed and obnoxious? Surely that NEVER happens. Seems so unlikely… I’ll ask at Writers’ Group this morning.

    Thanks for the deets, Quokka. I only have one question: does anyone know where – near the Pancake Manor – I can park?

  69. Try the streets between there and the botanical gardens. The further you are from the riverside markets, and the closer you get to the freeway, the better your chances.

    Other than that there’s parking stations, but we usually find
    something on the street. There’s usually an argument about how to translate the parking signs (loading zone in what hours? Bus zone WHEN?) but that’s part of the fun.

  70. Your other option is to park at South bank (I think the parking is a bit more reasonably priced than the city) and walk over the bridge or catch the city cat to QUT at gardens point.

    If you go for that option, we’ll either walk back with you or drop you off when we’re done with the carb loading.

    Google the parking at Myer centre, I think its’ either $15 or $7 special for the day. But its been a while so don’t quote me.

  71. OK.
    I’ve booked for 8 under the name ‘Quokka’.
    Yum. Syrup. Carbs. Nuts.

    What more could a girl wish for?

  72. Vodka?

  73. I like the way that Cat thinks. Oh and bacon.

  74. If you want to toss in the boystown prize home I’ll forgo the vodka. But not the bacon. I’m going to hell for that, poor piggies.

  75. Mmm, piggies in hell. Barbecued pork. My favourite.

    Thanks for the parking tips, Quokka. See you all there!

  76. Snff, snff. Is it me or is that crackling?

  77. Can’t it be both?

  78. I hope Greybeard doesn’t smell like crackling. Otherwise when we finally meet, I’m going to do to him what I did to the Boss when he worked at that Cadbury place.

    *Liiiiiiiiiiick!*

    And that might be hard to explain to our respective spouses.

  79. “Jeeves! More Old Spice, man, and quickly!”

  80. I think I can safely guarantee you that at 9am in the pancake manor all you will smell is alcopops and bubblegum courtesy of the under age nightclubbers who stagger in there when the clubs kick them all out at 5am.

  81. I’m wondering if Madame Morgana is remembering a certain discussion about faeries… and grandma’s hanky… and what we thought of old spice…

  82. Old Spice… hehehe.

  83. Well, you’ve lost me, but I think I short circuited a few memory cells in the last few weeks so no surprises there.
    I really do have a crap memory.

  84. You might have to go like Guy Pierce in “Memento”, Quokka and start tattooing important facts on yourself.

    Like “feed the cats” and “I hate Lobes”.

  85. How about a tatt of a cat eating a lizard?

    I was reading the other day that monitor lizards (like Lobes) store a rare and dangerous poison in their innards. I forget the name of the poison, but it is apparently vital to the Voodoo process of creating zombies.

    I wonder if BarnesM knows this?

  86. Judging from his thinking processes that toxic venom is stored inside Lobes’ mind.

  87. I’ve always used tetrodotoxin as the base myself, from the Fugu fishies.

  88. I thought that was one of the ingredients in toothpaste?

  89. That was it, Greybeard! Tetrodotoxin! I knew someone with a better memory than mine would come up with it.

    Why were we talking about poisons again?

    Oh, that’s right. I hope you’re wrong, Quokka. If toothpaste is made out of Lobes’ poison glands, I am never brushing my teeth again.

  90. It’s alright, Catty. You can make a workable toothpaste substitute from bicarb of soda and an abrasive agent – what’s left after a cremation, finely powdered, should do it.

    Guaranteed 100% Lobes free!

  91. What is this toothpaste of which you speak? A paste made from teeth? If it’s mildly abrasive I could use it for polishing metal I guess.

  92. Hmm… obviously, Greybeard will be requiring his pancakes blended on Sunday. No chewing required!

  93. There is no way I’m using cremation ash on my teeth, Quokka. Look what it’s done to your windows!

  94. Not my recipe, Catty, its Madame’s – although I’m not averse to the product idea.

    Speaking of ash encrusted windows, I have the boys from Boring Chores coming on Monday to do my blinds, screens, windows, doors etc.

    Unfortunately my excuse of ‘I can’t do this, my wrists are FKED’ has fallen by the wayside. As you may recall, the surgeon was deeply suspicious that he’d misdiagnosed me when acupuncture improved all the symptoms. I went for a nerve conduction test on Thursday afternoon – which involved a series of electric shocks through both hands/arms – and I’ve been given the all clear for carpal tunnel.

    So my mystery tingling and aches have been attributed to muscle tension.

    Just as well I had the acupuncture before I went ahead with the surgery.

    Anyway, I figure this saves us about 6 grand in surgery bills so my idea of preventative medicine is to get SOMEONE ELSE to clean the bloody windows from here on.

  95. OMG! Nothing could more clearly explain the deep & fundamental differences between man and woman than Quokka’s last para. You save $6K and spend it on CLEANING??
    I. Am. Aghast. No humongous LCD TV? No new Hexcore i7 PC? Not even a stinking iPad? No toys at all? This is such a depressing development that I may go into a decline from which only repeated applications of Auchentoshan can revive me.

    (Congrats on avoiding surgery tho)

  96. My excuse is that I don’t give a rat’s. I tell the Boss, “if you care so much about the windows, YOU wash them”.

    He did. Once. Then he came over to the dark side. So called because the windows are so filthy, no light can penetrate. Saves me a fortune on blockout curtains.

  97. Great news, Quokka – no surgery AND you’ve got serfs to do your grunt work.

    I had a look at the Pancake Manor menu… it’s a three course breakfast, right?

    Catty, I like it and am behind you 100%. Don’t tint your windows – just stop giving a rat’s.

  98. Thank you, thank you.
    I don’t like hospitals or surgery so I am very well pleased with life.

    It also means that I can blame the NT ‘show more comments’ BS for inducing symptoms of carpal tunnel. My next mission is to visit the optometrist and see if I can blame the ruin of my eyes on that as well.

    I’m glad I’m not the only one already fantasizing about Sunday Breakfast. Yum.

  99. Hair yesterday, gone today….

  100. Hang in there, Mayhem. Just think of all the shampoo you don’t have to buy. And I can lick your head clean after you stick it in the chocolate fountain…. oh, wrong thread….

  101. Quokka, what you need is a good long hand/forearm massage. That’ll fix any muscle tension.

  102. Scott’s right, Quokka. Rub catnip all over your arms and let your kitties lick the tension right out of them.

  103. Yup, I used to have a massage once a month, I should have put it together that the symptoms started flaring when I stopped doing that.

    My yoga instructor said it was coming from my shoulders, I really must get back to class and back into regular practice.

  104. Marvelous news, I found Bertie Beetles in the sweet shop near Central Station. I also found a chocolate shop in Adelaide street called ‘chocolate to die for’.

    Yum.

  105. Looks like we have our 8 peoples…

    The lovely Monster Yuppy will wander down for a short stack, and Janet Leach, (Quokka you may have seen/met her at Avid Reader?), would love to join us as well.

    Have tweeted GirlClumsy a couple of times with no response, Moko sends regrets, but issues a counter invitation to meet him and his wife and mini goats at the Mt Gravatt show after Breakfast. No response from the Boss, but Sunday Breakfast is probably family time for him.

    Quokka, was the person you were forgetting Domestic Daze? I have tweeted her as well, but she hasn’t been around twitter a great deal in recent weeks.

    Anywho, if we happen to get another blow-in or two I’m sure it can be sorted. See you tomorrow.

  106. Daze! Of course. Thanks Mayhem.
    I did think of Nat, (not GC) but I don’t know how to reach her and I’m pretty sure that when last I checked her blog was a No Comment ghost town. I think she’s rather preoccupied making her film anyway.

    Good to hear that monster is checking in.
    If he’s bringing Mrs. Yuppy we’ll just need an extra seat. I’m sure we can wangle it.

    I think I’ve met Janet.
    Nice twitterorg Mayhem.
    See you all tomorrow at 9.

  107. Lovely to see you all and my profuse apologies for arriving too late to warn you all about the coffee.

    I checked, BTW, and the writers festival is on from 1 – 5 September, not the 18th or the 25th as I’d thought. Perhaps we should all gather at a Baconery at this time to get the taste of Pancake Manor coffee out of everyone’s mouths.

  108. Mmm… bacon. Count me in!

    Mayhem, how were the mini goats?

  109. P.s. How did the sock shopping go, Quokka?

    BTW, thanks for the Chocolate to Die For menu… it’s now stuck together with my drool. Do you think they’d post me up some Tasmanian fudge?

  110. I went into JB hi fi where I lost my shopping list, my memory, and my enthusiasm for shopping.

    I came home and watched DVDs with the bloke, kicked myself for not going to see Moko’s little goats, and then we turned on the AC in the living room, overdosed on sushi and noodles so that we didn’t have the energy to do chores as planned.

    All in all a lovely afternoon but now I’m stuck with the chores on my own. Oh, and The Hulks from Boring Chores have rescheduled to Wednesday afternoon.

    Did you pick up a paper and look at the writers festival program? There’s some things on Thursday and Friday that I’d like to see, and some stuff on the weekend that I’m lukewarm about. The crowds on the weekend do tend to get to me so I’ll have to think about that.

    There’s also an Archie Roache concert on the Friday night, I think, which I’m kind of tempted by.

  111. Oh, duh, not sure. Do they have a web site and an email address?

    If they don’t do mail order you’ll just have to come back and stock up. Which means we will have to do breakfast again.

  112. I will track down the Festival programme and check it out. I think it’s on earlier than the school holidays, though, which may be a factor.

    Breakfast again it is! With a sidetrip to Chocolate to Die For, afterwards. Or perhaps we could buy take-away coffees and just breakfast at CTDF?

  113. Sounds deadly.

    That said, my chocolate cravings usually kick in after 3pm and I do like a bit of Piggy in the Morning. If we go to Lock and Load or such again, I can always get the bloke to drop us in the city.

    I think the festival is Sept 1 – 5.
    Do you think Jess would sign my floaties or is that just too evil to even contemplate?

  114. Too late. You’ve already contemplated it. Clearly you have gone over to the dark (70% cocoa) side.

  115. You should get a model container ship and get her to sign that, Quokka.

    You know, like the one that nearly wiped her out before she began?

  116. With ideas like that MM, you should be working for The Chaser.

  117. Did you hear that, Chaser? Job offers care of this site will be given due consideration.

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