Smash!

Yesterday was proceeding according to plan, until I went to exit the roundabout to enter my town and some dismal, doughy woman collected the front passenger side of Dragon Wheels.

I was more affronted by her insistence that I was at fault, than the accident itself.  Thank goodness a pair of lovely ladies who saw what had happened stopped and give me their details.  And the cops I summoned backed me up as well.  But who knew that accidents are no longer reportable unless someone’s been injured?  When I were a lad it was if there was more than $2,500 worth of damage to the vehicles.

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58 Responses

  1. That’s terrible, Madam! Are you o.k?

  2. Accidents suck. Hope you’re all OK and yeah, I find it strange that we no longer have to report them.

  3. Yes, I am absolutely fine, thanks all. Adrenaline’s a funny thing, though, isn’t it? When I parked and got out of the car my head felt clear as a bell but my hands were shaking like Errol Flynn coming off a bender.

    i am cross that she’s hurt our lovely Dragon Wheels. He’s been such a good car.

  4. Oh Noes, MM. That sucks. Is that one of those two lane roundabouts? I hate those damned things, nobody understands how to use them & there’s always someone willing to cut you off & ram you. I’ve wound up doing circles of the damned things at the GC because of aggro drivers overtaking me on the outside lane.
    How much damage to the car? is it drivable?
    What a pain!

  5. Just driveable. The passenger door won’t open, the wheel alignment’s fractionally off, the front lights are smashed up and there was an odd hissing sound that I didn’t want to think too much about driving in to work this morning.

    I’m hoping AAMI come through with a booking for the repairs and hire care today.

  6. Fingers crossed. Thank goodness you didn’t have a passenger, since that’s the side that copped the hiding.
    And I wouldn’t worry about the odd hissing sound, MM.
    I’d have been making that sound too.
    xxx

  7. The hissing might have been a snake in the engine bay. I’ll leave him as a surprise for the insurer.

  8. Stupid snake. Doesn’t he know there’s a banquet to be had under your kitchen stove?

  9. Well, in a mouse update, Jet’s dispatched one, and I caught one in my mouse choker last night.

    So I’m level-pegging with the cats. Tonight’s the tie-breaker!

  10. Here’s a tip: If you’re using ordinary wooden mousetraps, bait them with a small piece of a barbecue flavoured Shapes biscuit. The strong smell attracts mice, and the biscuits wedge well into a standard wooden trap. Unlike pepitas or peanut butter, the mouse can’t get Shapes out without setting off the trap.

  11. What flavour pizza should I used on the 80kg vermin trap I’ve got under my house, Catty?
    Oh wait, I know.
    Keens Curry powder sprinkles with chicken salt, over raw liver.
    That’ll do it.

  12. 80kg trap? What, are you trying to catch NTO? If so, then I recommend baiting it with tradesmen and unopened mail.

  13. LOL. Catty wins the internet, again.

  14. To be honest, I quite like Keens. I know, I know, I’m such a dag.

  15. The mustard I can accept. The curry powder, and you are a lost cause, Catty love.

  16. Wow. I’ve never seen anything like those.
    Inventors. They’re so clever.

  17. I wonder how many kids lost fingernails sticking their fingers in those traps.

  18. Not to mention tongues, and tips of their noses. It does explain a certain look, back in kindergarten.

  19. They’re really effective. And there’s no way of getting the bait out. And surviving, I mean.

    Also, you don’t get half-mangulated things dragging the trap around the kitchen squealing to be put out of their misery. Shudder.

    • “Also, you don’t get half-mangulated things dragging the trap around the kitchen squealing to be put out of their misery.” Poor TGP. He’ll have to learn to leave the traps alone. (Pleasedon’ttellhimIsaidthat)

  20. Maybe I should set one on the corner under the lamp post. It might put an end to all the things that shriek and bellow & hobble around Freak Street, enticing me to put them out of their misery.

  21. You might need a wider gauge choker.

  22. Considering the length of NTO’s long nose, yes, that was part of my evil plan.

  23. I used to design mouse traps in high school when I was bored. Which was often. I think there were nearly 70 of them but fortunately I’ve thrown away the sketches. One dropped the mouse into a solution of Nair (I think that’s what it was). It climbed out, went bald and froze. One used a razor-sharp glass fan to blow yummy cheese smell towards the mouse. On following the smell, its nose would be snipped off…and you can guess the rest. The Rube Goldberg creation that dropped the mouse into a cannon with a perforated end plate, simultaneously lighting a match and blasting the mouse into the garden as a nourishing spray of fertiliser was purely awful but I was much influenced by Heath Robinson, Rube Goldberg and the Marquis de Sade at that age. TGP and I would either have been friends or rivals. Still, look on the bright side. He might grow up like me!

  24. I like the idea of blasting the, erm, ‘mouse’ out of a canon & turning it into fertilizer.
    How are the Visitors, Khan GB? have you terrified the girlfriend into running out into the snow, yet?

  25. Visitor #1 was the daughter of an old friend of Lyn’s and she left this morning. She’s a great fan of Miss Fisher so we did this (posting one link per comment):

  26. And https://www.dropbox.com/s/xnkm7llskjezowi/Greenhouse2.jpg?dl=0

  27. And https://www.dropbox.com/s/ssst8kercw44j1u/Stairs.jpg?dl=0

  28. And we’re encouraging the GF as gently as possible. She seems a nice one. Poor kid. Even the Grand Evil is helping. She took an olive off HGBson’s plate and said “yoink!” in sweet and dulcet tones. I guess you know the mix of sweet and evil well MM?

  29. Heh heh. Yoink indeed. Who would have modelled olive theft to her, I wonder?
    That set of links seem to have blown the brains out of my ipad, GB, so I’ll have to look at that when it’s warm enough to seat myself at the Big Mac.
    I’ve got my first Miss Fisher from the BCC library & my ipad is ever so happy with that, thankfully.
    It’s the first ebook I’ve ever borrowed from the council library, & you are all right, they’re very good. The research that she must have done to write these – wow!

  30. Aunt Prudence’s house! I’m insanely jealous. Is it a limited edition tour, or might it be open if I should venture south again?

    Yes, sweet & evil is SOP around here. We had a bust up over school pick-up on Thursday, which got to the point of digital exhortations on the tablet to be left alone. An hour or so after (refused) dinner the creature emerged with a plaintive, “Do you still love me?” for cuddles and reconciliation.

    How early do NIDA and/or the Senate take them?

    • The house itself is open all the time but the Miss Fisher costumes only until the end of September. Even I (bloke that I am) was impressed with the insane level of detail in things you’d never notice. A genuine 20’s silk tabard worn over a dress for a few seconds and they’d spent hours strengthening in with a layer of modern tulle(?). The jewellery (which is on display) and her gold-plated pistol are all of the period. Lounging pajamas made from lengths of 20’s curtain found in an op shop, all the stuff on the dressing-table…

  31. They can join political parties once they’re in high school. The Young Liberals are always recruiting…. heh heh heh…

    I wouldn’t recommend NIDA, though. You don’t want him committing suicide.

  32. That exhibition sounds fab, but it’s completely borked my ipad access to your blog, MM.
    GB, Cyber Saboteur Extraordinairre.
    I’m sure it can’t be that I’ve broken the internet (again).

    • (Oops)

  33. Damn. Well, I’m glad you got to enjoy it for all of us, GB. And that some good has come of this weekend. I have to venture all the way to Caloundra in this freezing cold to take Gigantor to AFL.

    The wages of sin are not death, they are football in the Antarctic Vortex.

  34. I’m cold. I want soup.

  35. I hope you enjoyed those sins Madam, because it sure sounds as though you’re paying for them.
    We’ve got HGBson and the GF tonight and tomorrow night. They’ve gone for a walk to help digest lunch from up in the ‘Nongs while Lyn prepares a huge ragout with pork and beef and stuff. I just lit the fire and it’s been a beautiful sunny (if cold) day. Tonight there will be whisky tasting. I think I must have paid off my few and paltry sins…? (If any)

    • Unless this is the wind-up before the take-down, GB.

  36. Mmm, food.
    Catty this month’s food fad involves eating nothing but soup and a stale bread crust to raise money for the homeless. So if you do eat soup, pat yourself on the back for being trendy.
    We’ve got leftover Govindas from last night, and we just ate our way through the food festival at SB OTW home from Dirty Dancing.
    It was good, but it would have been better if the young couple behind me had left their toddler at home & I didn’t have to endure an hour of it’s kicking & whimpering before the usher decided it was best to move us before I jumped the seat & banged the parent’s heads together to see if that might cure their stupidity.
    We had brilliant seats for the second half, and I’m really glad I wasn’t there when the child erupted in a full on screaming tantrum & the usher had to lead it out in the midst of a tender love scene, but OMG. There is no hope for humanity.
    I asked the usher why they had let a child that age in to see a show called Dirty Dancing & she said because they are government funded they can’t discriminate on age.
    Oh well. Let’s hope they learned their lesson & next time they want to watch a bunch of dancers bump & grind & fondle each other, they leave the kid at home to watch pron with the babysitter. At least he’ll be able to doze off on the floor rather than be forced to squirm uncomfortably on a parent’s lap for three hours in a noisy theatre.
    I know that Irma is due, but seriously – When did people get so stupid?

  37. Hey MM, do you reckon you could delete the 1st pic of Aunt Pru’s that Greggles posted & he will repost it? My ipad is very upset with it, and yes, I’ve tried turning it off & on.
    It’s not showing up as a link, & while it’s a fabulous pic, it’s a bugger to have comments relegated to thumbnail size on the far left of my screen.
    (And yes, I’m sure he did it deliberately just to make my life difficult.)

  38. Voila! I’ve deleted it reluctantly because it was a lovely pic of Fifi.

    Well, to add insult to injury Caloundra beat us. And then I tried to paypal some delivery pizza because I’d completely given up on life at that point – and it took my money but gave me no pizza!

    Stupid sins.

  39. Thanks MM. I only asked because he’s promised to add a new link to the same photo. Curiously it hasn’t fixed the ipad problem, and it’s only doing it with your blog. I’m installing a software update on the ipad now to see if that fixes it, but it’s weird. It says that I can view it in Reeder instead, but I’m pretty sure Reeder is dead & buried. Stoopid glitchy tech.
    Re: the pizza, How Annoying.
    Which company ripped you off? Have they offered to make any sort of reparation? I’ve got friends in Caloundra, they’ll appreciate the warning.

  40. It was Dominos, back home in Coolum though. I emailed them my ire and they’ve sent a couple of messages since, so they SEEM to be doing something. We’ll see how long it takes for the money to go back into my account.

  41. Hmm. Let me know how it goes.
    the Punjabi Palace down in West End have an online ordering & paying system, & they deliver, but we’ve only ever done pick up. They’ve been very efficient, but then again, it’s a family business so there’s probably not the quota of spotty stoner teens to screw that one up.

  42. It really has been an annoying week.

    Or do you think this is just the Dawn of Cranky Old Womanhood and everything from now to the grave will just irritate me?

    • Ummm…

  43. Do you have Menulog in Qld? It’s evil. An app-based really easy menu system for ordering from dozens of local take-aways. Sooo easy.

  44. Maybe we do, but I don’t have a smart phone or tablet!

    More incentive to upgrade. The only real reason I’ll do it is that the battery in this dear old second-hand Nokia is finally dying. Well, that and the intermittent demon possession.

  45. Ah yes. I recall casting out that particular demon, only to find it was just resting.

  46. I was going to ask if it was Dominos. I’ve had my fair share of problems with that bunch of idiots. Hopefully you get your cash back plus some sort of conciliatory free pizza deal. They really are bastards though, so I doubt it.

  47. I’ll get my own revenge. I’ll send Gigantor to work for them.

  48. Snarfle. I spat tea all over my computer screen at that.
    Too evil, MM.

  49. I’d send TGP, but I think we all know he’ll have ‘hos working for him instead. Yes, at the moment I am that ho.

  50. Testing 1, 2, 3, Pool.

  51. Oh well done that man.
    Now my Big Mac is borked too.
    MM, since GB is intent on causing mischief here, can I beg you to start a new thread?
    I’ve tried several things to fix the ipad but despite all of Khan GB’s *helpful* suggestions, I still can’t get the SMASH thread to load properly on my ipad.
    Catty, can you view it OK on yours?
    If so then perhaps I just need to book into the genius bar to find out what went wrong. It started with the mousetrap, so perhaps it’s been reprogramed to swallow ipad software?

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